Part 2

With our adoption of Raeya, we were not allowed to visit the Social Welfare Institute. We did meet the director and an ayi on Gotcha Day and the following day when we finalized the paper work and accepted our little girl.

With Chloe, we were allowed to visit the orphanage even though we were told before heading to China we would not be allowed to. Oh, the joy and excitement of being able to see where she grew up and the wonderful people who took care of her. We were also hopeful that we would be able to see her friends and find out why we could not adopt her special friend. Up until this point we were only told that their were rules that would not allow to do so.

Our wonderful guide arranged all of our transportation needs and double checked with us to make sure we really wanted to do this. She was not so sure it would be a good idea for Chloe to go back. I had talked to several families who were blessed with the experience of an adoption trip to the orphanage and felt we were doing the right thing.

So, we get to the train station early in the morning! We have toys and snacks to keep the girls occupied. Greg and I have lots of time to people watch. I have fallen in love with the Chinese people.



Our guide, Isabel, hurried us to the front of the train to get a family photo before settling into our private section. We were excited, nervous and humbled about this opportunity to see and experience, with Chloe, the first 5 years of her life that we had missed out on. At no time did we think that the 5 years "missed" was actually 5 years of God lining up all the "coincidences" we would encounter with this adoption.



On the train, we settled in and looked out the windows in anticipation of seeing the land from which or daughter came. Memories and pictures we could put away to tell her later when she began to ask questions. However, the action and memories were about to occur inside the train as a young female attendant began changing the cushion covers in our cabin.

The province, where Chloe was born, does not see as many Caucasians as other provinces so we were an attraction to be stared at, asked questions of, taken pictures with and the most fun of all was to help with English practice.

This young girl who was changing cushion covers could not keep her eyes off our girls.


She sat down with us and began asking Isabel questions. Isabel explained that this young lady was overwhelmed that we had two daughters from China. She herself had been abandoned at the age of 4 on a street corner. Parents who were faced with no good options did what they thought was best.

I think everyone is aware of the one child rule in China. A rule that is suppose to help with the over population of this beautiful country. However, there are 5 groups that are currently allowed to have a second child. Chinese couples in rural areas are allowed to have a second child if their first-born is a girl, as are couples from China’s ethnic minority groups. Families where the father is an occupation deemed to be dangerous like a soldier, fisherman, etc...Families in which both parents are only children, or where the first offspring is disabled, may also have a second child. For those families that do not fall into this category or a family in the category that has three children, a high tax is required. A tax that many times is more than the families annual salary.

This young girl fell into the last category. She had an older sister who was able to help the family more and a younger brother who would insure the parents were taken care of in the older years. The family could not pay the tax and the only option left for the family was to abandon the child so she could be taken to an orphanage and adopted by another family. She was adopted by a family with a disabled son. She was adopted to take of the son when the parents were no longer physically able. She worked four jobs to send money back home to them.

As Isabel, told us her story this young girl broke into tears and began crying. She told us she was the naughty one and this is why she was abandoned. As children, when tragedies happen at such an early age we blame ourselves. Some are lucky and a person will step into their lives to love them and healing can occur. Others are not so lucky. They suffer a tragedy in the home and no one steps in to love them. Parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles all turn a blind eye and this child grows up to think they are a no body and they will rebel or try to earn love.


But the party grew and we left them laughing. Isabel has looked for this young girl every time she has ridden the Bullet Train and has not been able to find her again. She left such an impression on us.



These children whether in an orphanage across the ocean, here in the United States or in a family next door to you need your love. Please do not turn a blind eye.

Adoption is not for everyone. There are many ways to make a difference in a child's life. Some times just taking that extra time to invite a child over to your home so they can see what real love looks like can make all the difference in the world.

I believe God has called me to work with the orphans in China. I do not know how yet. I know that a great burden has been placed on my heart. I know that my heart understands these children who have been set aside by family members regardless of the reason it had to be done.

We can not point fingers and blame the Chinese people. Not even if you have been there and visited in their homes can you understand the great pressure they are under. However, we can blame ourselves for not doing anything about it.



Hey, I think my family is great and we hope to be back to get you soon. We now know the obstacles of making you part of our family but we know we are fit for the race.
Love you, Chloe.